Wanting It
by Brooke McCartney
Summary: Brooke meets a new boy at her school for the first time, but what she doesn't know is that he may be all she ever wanted.


Wanting It

By: Brooke H.

It was another one of those boring & dull mornings – where you never know what's going to happen & in the least bit care.

I hit the snooze button on my alarm clock, as I sat up, yawning. I stared out the window, watching its calm colors hang in the sky. The room was lit up by a faint blue light that was streaming in through the cracks between the drawn curtains.

I slowly crawled out of bed in my pink pajamas, only because my mom was yelling from downstairs for me to get up.

"IM COMING, MOM ..," I groaned, heading toward the bathroom.

"Brooke!" my sister, Julie, called, bounding into the room. "Stacy left you a message last night! She said something about a new kid or whatever .. No .. It was about math homework .. No, that was Danielle .. Umm .. I dunno."

I stared at Julie with my dullest expression. "I'll call her back later."

Seeing the look on my face, she quickly asked, "What's wrong? Today's the first day of school, you know."

"You think I care? I mean .. every year .. It's the same. I don't have a boyfriend--"

"You're desperate."

"What up with the quick answers? You high off of sugar or something?"

"I had 3 bags of Skittles when Mom wasn't looking."

"GET OUT." Just as she was about to walk out, I said, "Better not be MY 3 bags of Skittles."

I felt a slight surge of victory, as I watched the Skittles Hog storm off. But I couldn't shake off the feeling that she might've been right.

After the bumpy & quiet bus ride to the school, I spotted Stacy, Danielle, & Aubrey by the red lockers.

I readjusted my pink & orange backpack on my shoulder & strode over to them. "What are you guys talking about?"

Danielle turned to me, wearing the biggest smiles ever. (She hadn't been smiling a lot, since her pet hamster died.)

"There's a new kid coming .. & everyone says he's HOT," she rambled.

"Where is he?" I asked, stretching my neck & looking around.

Just then, the bell rang.

"Snap! I'll catch you guys later!" Aubrey shouted through the halls as she headed for her homeroom. I could see papers flying out of her backpack but didn't bother to tell her. (Knowing Aubrey, it was probably homework assignments from last year.)

"Later!" we all said in unison as we went to our separate directions.

I walked into homeroom, wondering if any of my other friends were in there. Realizing that none of them were there, I made my way through the crowded class to the back corner. I saw an unoccupied seat next to a boy with an olive-green shirt & baggy blue jeans.

"Is anyone sitting here?" I asked the blonde boy.

The boy looked at me up & down as if analyzing what I was wearing.

"No," he replied. "Go right on ahead."

"Thanks."

I settled into the chair, looking around the class. I heard the boy tap a pencil on his desk as if watching the clock tick away time.

Not knowing what I was doing, I said, "Hi. I'm Brooke." The boy turned to me & smiled, & for the first time, I saw that he was REALLY cute. "You're the new kid .. Aren't you?"

"Yeah," the boy half-chuckled. "I'm Jesse. Jesse McCartney."

"Hi, Jesse. Welcome to Cy-Creek High." I smiled back at him.

The bell finally rang for lunch after third period. I rushed to my locker, hoping to find Aubrey, Danielle, or Stacy to tell them about Jesse. (My lunch bag was bobbing wildly at my side.)

But I didn't find them.

I found Jesse.

I casually strolled to my locker & started fidgeting with my locker knob – just to get my Spanish spiral for next class.

"Uhhh .. Brooke? Can you help me open my locker? It's .. being weird," Jesse said, who apparently had the locker next to mine.

I laughed. "Most of the lockers here are really old," I informed. "What's your combo?"

"12-10-32."

"12-10? That's cool .. That's my birthday!" I laughed, but then I quickly blushed. "Whoa .. That was the first time I laughed all day .."

"Really? What's wrong?" Jesse asked, watching me now.

I opened the locker. "Nothing. Seriously nothing. Don't you ever get that, Jesse? Where you get to the point where you're bored of life?"

"Sometimes, but you just have to TRY to be optimistic sometimes. Hey .. umm .. How about you & I go to the new amusement park after school? I mean .. if you don't have --"

"No! I'd love to go!"

"Great," he replied. "Just meet me outside by the fountains."

"Fountains. Right. Okay. I'll see you later."

"Yeah .. & thanks for opening my locker." Jesse flashed me another one of his cute smiles.

"Sure thing, Jesse."

"YOU'RE KIDDING."

I shook my head, while falling in step with the rest of my friends.

"You & Jesse? Ha. That's weird," Danielle mumbled, giving an expression of slight dislike.

We were on our way to the lunch room. I spotted Brianna Bryan laugh & brush a hand on Baylor Smith's jacket.

"Jesse's really nice & sweet & .. cute." Upon seeing everyone's faces, I hastily added, "Not that being cute matters."

"This could be your first boyfriend!" Aubrey squeaked.

"I KNOW!" I said excitedly. "But we shouldn't be jumping to conclusions. I mean .. It's just an amusement park. We're just going to have fun."

"Behind the trees ..," Stacy mumbled under her breath.

"I HEARD THAT."

"Hey, Brooke! I was wondering where you were."

"Hey, Jesse. Of course, I did. If I couldn't make it, I'd call you," I pointed out, turning my cell phone on & then putting it back into my purse.

"But you don't have my number."

"Oh. Right. That, too."

"Do you want it?"

"Um --" I felt taken back & wasn't sure of what to say.

"I'll give it to you, anyway – just in case."

"Okay .."

I handed Jesse a pen & piece of paper. I watched, as he wrote the name 'Jesse' then scribbled his number underneath it.

"Can I have yours? Just in case I have to call you."

"It's always 'just in case' with you, huh?"

Jesse laughed. I wrote down my number, anyway, & tore the piece of paper in half.

"Shall we?" Jesse asked, holding out his arm.

"We shall!" I laughed, hooking my arm with his, as we set off toward his car.

"I want to try that ride."

"I dunno if I do .."

Jesse & I were looking up at 'Logger's Revenge' & were watching people scream as they plummeted down, splashing the cool water everywhere.

"C'mon, Brooke. It'll be fun," Jesse insisted, turning to face me. "Please?"

I turned to look at him, too, & finally saw his eyes – his deep green eyes .. They had such an intense but sensitive look in them that I never saw before ..

"Brooke? You okay?"

"OH. Yeah. I'm fine. But if I fall off & die from that ride, I'm coming back to murder you myself."

"Sure, sure .. Let's go."

We ran up the steps to the line, & as soon as our log came, I sat in the back.

"You sit in the front, Jesse, because if I fall forward, you're coming with me."

The log started up the moving ramp, & with every 'click' I heard, my arms around Jesse got tighter.

"I hope I could still breathe by the end of this ride," Jesse joked.

"You're the one who got me on this, remember?"

"But still .."

I rested my head on his back until our log was finally flowing with the rest of the water smoothly.

"Gosh, that was scary .." I let go of my grip on Jesse & looked at the water. "It's shiny."

Jesse laughed. "Ya think?"

Then I put my arms around Jesse's waist, again. Maybe this ride wasn't so bad after all.

"Watch out," Jesse warned.

"For what?"

"Here comes the drop."

I peered over his shoulder. "NOT NOW?"

Before I knew it, Jesse, the log, & I were diving headfirst downwards. I gave a scream, & hugged Jesse to my body as close as I could.

A few seconds later, we hit the bottom, & all I could hear was the laughter of the kids squirting water guns at us from the sidelines & the calm water flowing continuously.

"That was FUN!" he laughed.

Seeing Jesse's smile, my shock broke up into a laugh, & then I started to laugh, too. "YEAH, THAT WAS!"

Jesse helped me off the ride & then attempted to squeeze water out of his shirt.

"Not going to work, McCartney," I said, pulling him out into the sun.

"Yeah .. I was starting to think that, too."

The beach water streamed past our feet, as bits of seaweed landed onto the wet sand. Grains of sand swept past us up onto the shoreline.

"Hey! There's a seashell!" I remarked, bending down to pick up a pinkish-white seashell.

The pastel colors I once knew as the sky were being swallowed up by a warm yellow, magenta, orange, & red. Flocks of seagulls were flying over the ocean, & became little upside down W's in the distance.

"There are loads of 'em here," Jesse said, bending down with me.

"Let's collect a few .. for souvenirs."

Jesse picked up a big, blue, round seashell & held it up. "Do you think I can fit my brother in here?"

Jesse pulled up his car into my driveway. We both sat there silently, as if doing this could make time go a bit more slowly.

"Thanks, Jess, for taking me with you. I haven't had so much fun in the longest time," I said, breaking the silence & playing with my bag of seashells.

"& thanks for coming with me," Jesse replied, smiling. "I had a lot of fun today, too. We should do it again sometime."

"Yeah. We should."

"Well .. uh .. Good night."

"'Night, Jess."

I hesitated, then quickly leaned over to give him a peck on the cheek. I hopped out of the car. "Bye."

"Bye."

Before I closed the door, Jesse asked, "Brooke?"

Just seeing the look in his eyes, I knew what he meant.

My insides turned stone-cold for a second, but then I climbed back into the car & shut the door. I leaned over & felt his lips touching mine & his hand on the side of my neck. Jesse laid me down in the back seat & pulled off his jacket.

"Jess," I whispered. "Let's go inside."

We got out, & I jammed the key into the lock & opened the door, then shutting it just as Jesse had me against the wall. His lips brushed against my neck, as I giggled.

"Come here," I moaned, pulling him upstairs.

He kissed me against the wall again, so I had no choice but to push him into my room & then onto my bed. I got on top of him, laughing, & helped him unbutton his jeans & take off his shirt ..

"I can't believe you did that," Stacy said flatly, shaking her head more than before. "You're crazy. Were you even thinking? We're only 17!"

"Your quote sounds as if it was taken out of my mom," I replied darkly.

"I'm serious, Brooke. Promise me you won't do it, again."

"Do it. Ha. That's funny. That's exactly what we did .."

"Brooke, I'm SERIOUS."

"Okay .. okay .."

"You DO realize that you only knew Jesse for a DAY? & then you go off & make out & have sex with him? What's wrong with you?" Stacy went on.

"Jesse & I DO connect, okay? I mean ..," I sighed, "he gets me – more than anyone else I've ever met. I feel like I've known Jesse forever .."

"Then what's his favorite color?"

"Orange."

"That was too easy, but anyway .. THE POINT IS --"

"Stacy, it's okay. I never asked for your help, alright? So chill. Let's go get a soda or something."

"NO."

I looked at her with an expression of a mixed shock & confusion.

"Stacy, what's WRONG?"

"What's wrong? Why aren't you listening to me?"

"Can we stop making a huge business out of this, Stace? We only did it ONCE .."

"& then you're going to end up doing it, again. Think about what might happen, Brooke."

"YES! I KNOW! I MIGHT GET PREGNANT!" I yelled, getting up from her bed. I couldn't stand it anymore. "But it's not YOUR problem, is it? So why do you care so much?"

"Because I'm your friend, Brooke. I don't want bad things happening to you .."

"To tell you the truth, Stacy, if I could have a child with ANY guy in this world, it'd be with Jesse, okay? & yes, I KNOW we've only known each other for a day, & I know our other guy classmates for 3 years, but that doesn't mean they know what I'm going through! Jesse knows what I need. That's why he took me to the amusement park. He knows there's more to me than just shopping malls, grades, & being flat-out boring. Why can't you just be happy for me that Jesse & I met?"

& without another look at Stacy, I marched out of her room & out the door, tears rolling down my crimson cheeks.

At home, I buried my head into my pillow, thinking over & over about what Stacy said.

"But it's true," I muttered to myself. "I want Jesse. I NEED Jesse .."

Just then, I heard a knock on the door. I quickly wiped away my tears & managed a low 'Come in'.

Jesse walked through the door, wearing a weak smile.

"Hey," he greeted, sitting himself next to me.

"Hey," I replied, resting my head against his shoulder. "Stacy called you, didn't she?"

"Yeah .."

"Jesse, what do you think? Don't you feel the same way as I do?"

"Of course, I do, Brooke, but .."

"But what?"

"What if Stacy's right?"

I sat straight up and tilted my head at him, eyes slightly squinted. "What do you mean?"

"I mean .. we only met for a day .. Maybe we should take it slower. A lot slower."

I heard Jesse heave a sigh.

"So .. are you .. breaking up with me?" I asked, my heart starting to tear at the edges.

"No, Brooke. I'm just saying that we should start out as friends first – really good friends."

My vision started to become blurry, again, as a lump formed in my throat that left a couple minutes earlier came back.

"I care a lot about you, Brooke, & I don't want to do anything that'll hurt you," Jesse whispered, holding me close then kissing me on the forehead. He entwined his fingers in mine. "I'm sorry."

"It's – It's okay, Jesse. I understand," I croaked.

Jesse rested his chin on my head. "I love you, Brooke."

"I love you, too, Jesse." I sniffed & wiped away a running tear. "You have baseball practice right now, don't you?"

Jesse gave me a weak smile. "Yeah."

"Well, then, I'll see you later, Jess."

"Yeah .. I'll call you."

Jesse bent down, & held his lips against mine.

"Bye."

I watched, as Jesse walked out the door.

It felt so painful because it felt like he was walking right out of my life.

But I remembered what he told me.

We'd be friends.

Just for now.

& who knows?

Maybe we'll come back to where we started again someday.


End file.
